The difference between here and there, and when there becomes here
Family, Friends, Travel October 1st, 2007I had a funny conversation with Alison today about why people who are prone to melancholy feel the desire to wander or roam. She pointed to me to this poem that a mutual friend of ours showed to her. The Wanderer, and its interesting how I can identify with a few of the areas. (Granted, this was obviously written some time ago and times have changed). And she brought up the ‘greener pastures’ idea. Perhaps, but here are some of my thoughts.
The thoughts of a wanderer…
An interesting part of me that some people either; recognize and understand, recognize and don’t understand, don’t recognize and understand (oddly enough), or are completely oblivious. Is, that I’m never happy ‘here’ and I’m always looking to go ‘there’. Sometimes ‘there’ is a place, a time, or a being. But regardless, its never ‘here’. The problem with going ‘there’ is that once I’m there, its then ‘here’ and I feel the urge to find another ‘there’ shortly after arriving at ‘here’. I don’t think I’d be where I am today if this wasn’t a part of who I am. I’d probably be back at some old ‘here’ landing where ever my decisions and life put me. But, instead I followed the path of ‘there’.
For some friends this behavior is completely incomprehensible. It causes confusion and misunderstanding for which I deeply apologize to them. For others, they get it, or know that its not important that I’m not content with staying ‘here’ with them and that at some point our ‘theres’ will intersect and all will be good again. Sometimes when I’m on a journey I don’t think to let people know where I am. If that makes me inconsiderate, then I apologize. Its nothing personal, its just who I am. I accept my friends for who they are, I can only hope they all do the same for me.
But back to the topic of ‘here’ and ‘there’. It is very unlikely that I will ever be happy just being ‘here’, and I’ll be happiest going ‘there’. It doesn’t mean I’ll be happy when ‘there’ becomes ‘here’, but that I’ll be happy making the journey. Whether that journey is physical, intellectual, spiritual, or emotional. For me its the journey, its the new experience. It probably explains the issues with my relationships, because at some point I was ‘here’ too long and I couldn’t figure out how to get both of us ‘there’. Or, perhaps our ‘theres’ were not the same, thus our paths diverted. There is nothing wrong with that but unfortunately it leads to more misunderstanding and unhappiness of most parties involved.
So, my parting thoughts. If I am ‘here’ with you enjoy the time. And if you go ‘there’ with me enjoy the journey. And, if you stay in the ‘here’ do not fret for I shall always be your friend. Its just time for me to move on to the next ‘there’, and know that at some point our future ‘theres’ will cross, and we will be ‘here’ together again my friend.
October 1st, 2007 at 3:43 pm
Well, not all who are prone to melancholy like to wander, in fact they would rather cocoon themselves when that feeling hits; however, the appeal of wandering is to emerge from that feeling because obviously, there have to be better pastures than the one one is in when feeling melancholy. *wow, Dr. Seuss would be proud of this blog!
The “Grass is Always Greener” adage has a positive spin to it in that a change is being sought and normally, one could assume that better things are experienced through change. We all know that isn’t always the case and that change itself can always be daunting, thrusting someone into that melancholy mood) because quite frankly, one often believes that the mere scenic change should be work enough. It’s not so easy. One part is the journey, another is the arrival, and then what you do when you get there is quite another. Many aren’t prepared for the additional steps.
But it’s a good idea to be grounded and have a Point of Begining (POB- a term used in surveying). A place to start and know that wherever you go, you can safely return to. Even your seasoned travelers yearn for that POB after being away from it for too long. I don’t think that’d ever change
October 3rd, 2007 at 8:36 am
Sometimes you dont want to wander but find that you are in a rut and really need to go there from here but dont know how?
I found myelf in that situation wanting to stay here and not go there but needed a change and the change was made by certain circumstances completely out of my hands but for the better. So now I am on my way there and here will be waiting for me. Make any sense?
October 8th, 2007 at 10:32 am
It dawned on me today, why this may be the case too. Until more recently, being in front of the computer more hours than there are in a day was commonplace for you. Now you have found something that motivates and inspires you to get out there an experience things, and like any drug, you’re itching for another fix. Just this time, it’s more positive
Good thing you signed up for that interactive RPG called FirstLife
Welcome back 